DEATH TO “Brooksie!”

I for one am done hearing all-things “Brooksie!” 

First off, I don’t like Brooks. Albeit a great golfer, he’s super pompous. There’s just something about him that turns me off, and I’m not the only one. And now, when I’m forced to hear “Brooksie!”, either in person at the US Open or on TV, I’m reminded of how much his swagger on the course–and on Instagram–annoys me to the core.

Here’s the crux: I don’t like Bryson much more, but the “Brooksie!” outbursts have gone on long enough. Anyone yelling that term is just hoping they see another human being blow a gasket, which he did after losing the grueling BMW Championship playoff against Cantlay. (Side note: Wow, did that make for great sports TV!) 

It’s been reported that Bryson was part of a fan/athlete incident while walking up the tunnel underneath the grandstands after losing the playoff. Some jackass – who somehow had credentials to be “inside the ropes” – yelled the never-to-be-said-again term right in his face. Bryson lost his shit. Who wouldn’t have. I certainly would’ve. Cooler heads prevailed. Which is good because he would have killed that guy. Seriously.

Enough’s enough children. Stop yelling at the “awkward kid” DeChambeau just because you can — you’re yelling probably because you want to relive your own awkward glory days when you were cool-in-your-own-mind and picked on your pre-pubescent classmates.

Bryson’s an adult now. And so are you. Enough with the caustic potshots.

Remember, Karma’s a b-i-t-c-h, and Bryson doesn’t like to yell FORE. So keep your yap shut and enjoy the golf like the rest of us. White Claw in hand, smile on face, in awe.

UPDATE 8/31/21 2:30p PT — PGA Tour Commissioner Jay Monahan at his pre-Tour Championship presser just announced that all dumbasses who yell the never-to-be-said-again term at Bryson are going to be bounced from Tour events. Good. Bye. Bullies. At least for now.

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